1. Ladies Underwear with Inbuilt Calendar: Patent Number: US 5606748

2. Instant Face-Lift: Patent Number: US 4995379

3. Snore Alarm with Inbuilt Microphone and Head Angle Adjustment Device: Patent Number: 3089130

4. Method of Preserving the Dead: Patent Number: 748284

5. Television Tower with Revolving Restaurant and Airship Mooring Mast. The tower houses a transparent globe, for transcendental meditation. The elevators rise and descend on pressurised water from an underground reservoir. Tanks attached to the tower will pump beer to the local community: Patent Number: GB 1153249

6. Fart Collecting Device. Complete with air-tight tube for insertion into the rectum. The tube is connected to an air-tight gas bag: Application Number: GB 2289222

7. Method of Collecting, Identifying and Classifying Saliva: Patent Number: 5334502

8. Pet Display Clothing: Jackets or vests with tubular passageways large enough for a gerbil, or hamster to run around in. The passageways are transparent so your pet can be admired by onlookers: Patent Number: 5901666

9. Isolating a mammalian embryonic stem cell from a homogenous pluripotent outgrowth of a mammalian pre-implantation embryo: Patent Number: 9499785

10. Light Bulb Changer: Apparatus contains components that allow for the instant detection of burned out light bulbs. Will automatically remove and replace the dead bulb. The changer operates without human intervention:

Patent Number: US 6826983